RAISE YOUR GLASSES
It's New Year's resolution time again. Last year, somewhere on the site here, I pledged to watch more TV. Well, unfortunately, I carried out my resolution, and all I got over the past year was propaganda, garbage, and an over-saturation of junk.
Of course, my pledge to watch more TV was a joke, but as it turns out with some jokes, they become more sincere than humorous. I think I've had just about enough of Michael Jackson. Did he do it? Maybe, maybe not. Do I care? Maybe, maybe not. That's probably the sad thing, right there, the idea that I, or countless others, may not care if some pervert has been using his wealth and fame to have his way with people's children via 'sleep-overs' and parties at his Neverland Ranch. The coverage on television about this 'did he or didn't he' crap they keep asking us has anybody who watches programming with any regularity so desensitized to whatever the truth is about this subject that it can't help but make some of us feel guilty that we don't feel anything about it.
This is surely a different world than the one we used to live in. When I was growing up, there was no internet, no 700 channel universe, no CNN...indeed, the more I list these things off that we didn't have then and we do now, the more it seems like people like me come from the dark ages. Next you'll hear me saying, "back in my day, things were better because..." In fact, when I grew up, there were so many times when we were on the brink of annihilation from nuclear war with the Russians, with the cloud of Judgment Day hanging over our heads, that really today's troubles seem tame in comparison. Look at the ongoing struggles in the Middle East that date back to forever, not just recently. The Cuban Missile Crisis during the Kennedy era. The arms race during the Reagan years.
Now we're being bombarded by fear inflicted on us about everything from alligators roaming the sewers to terrorists living in our back yards, even if we don't have a back yard. The war in Iraq is finally gaining some opposition from the lazy armchair soldiers who were all for Bush and his oil-stock owning buddies when it began. With the next election nearing this coming November, and more and more truths coming out about the deviousness of Georgie Porgie and his puppeteers, suddenly Michael Moore, the Dixie Chicks and Willie Nelson don't look so anarchist.
The Jessica Lynch story was truly a good one. The theory: This young girl joined the military to go off to Iraq to fight the good fight, to defend her country, and nearly went down trying, taking out Iraqi soldiers as they closed in on her and finally captured her, where she was rescued by U.S. soldiers in a dramatic sweep of gunfire and courage! The FACTS: Jessica Lynch tried to get a job at Wal Mart in the town that she'd lived, and couldn't. Being a teenager and wanting to make money, she signed up with the military, not actually figuring she'd be sent away to the middle east to fight for Pappy and Junior's war for oil. In the heat of battle, her gun became jammed, leaving her unable to fire, and Iraqi soldiers captured her and brought her to a hospital, where she was treated for wounds she suffered by Iraqi hospital staff. But, needing more advanced medical attention and wanting to go home, she of course didn't want to be there. Eventually, U.S. soldiers barged into the hospital, without resistance, and took Lynch out of the building and into their safe and protective arms, where she finally got to come back home. Lynch has said to the media that she feels violated for how sensationalized the story became in all of its falsehoods. Welcome to the Republican Pro-War Propaganda Machine, honey!
The Mad Cow scare in Canada had quite the hoopla to it too, didn't it? One cow in Alberta was found to have BSE, the disease we know as Mad Cow Disease, and thousands upon thousands of cattle were destroyed. The U.S. immediately shut its doors to Canadian beef, as did pretty much the rest of the world. Meanwhile, the rest of Canada chowed down on steaks and hamburgers aplenty at bargain basement prices without all that much concern, hearing that one cow was infected and that it never made it into the food chain anyway. It wasn't really clear where the cow had come from, but I remember one place that was thought to be its origin was somewhere in the state of Washington. Of course, if that's true, you'll never hear of it. It's okay for the U.S. government to destroy Canada's economy, at least it'll make their own look better, where it's spinning out of control due to the immense spending on the war in Iraq. Now the U.S. has its own case of BSE to deal with, and they'll have to figure out how to get around all the crap that Canada had to dodge during its crisis. Of course, where do they first point the finger without hesitation?
One of the biggest news stories came out when American Forces finally captured Saddam in a hole in the ground. He came out of there looking pretty haggard, like he'd been there a while. Maybe there's a palace down there, eh? Now maybe they'll get a few leads on where all of those invisible weapons of mass destruction are. According to pictures we've seen, the first place they looked was in his mouth and in his hair. Man, they're getting desperate.
Of course one of the highlights for straight men everywhere on TV was when Madonna kissed Christina at the MTV video awards show. Oh wait, Madonna kissed Britney too. Who knew? Anyway, I find it amusing how Christina bitched to the press how she would never sink so low as to try a cheap stunt like that to get publicity the way Britney did. Fact is, she did exactly the same thing, and nobody cared!
A lot of people from the showbiz industry died this year too, people of prominence. Johnny Cash finally rode off into the sunset after years of suffering. John Ritter passed away the same day, or close. Both of these guys were enjoying pretty good comebacks in their careers. Bob Hope died, and he lived to be, what, 100? Pretty good, really. His contribution to show business was more than anyone could notate in a paragraph like this, so I won't even try. Wrestlers dropped like flies. Crash Holly, Road Warrior Hawk, Stu Hart (father of the famous Owen and Bret Hart, trainer of countless famous wrestlers), just to name a few. You'd think that being a wrestler these days, you would get danger pay for your line of work when you were in the ring.
The year looking ahead looks to be an interesting one, to say the least, with the Pope about to announce a fresh set of rules to try to align the Catholic Church. This should bring about a firestorm from the media, which just recently pounced on one of the bishops for having "sympathy for Saddam Hussein's treatment". Leave it to the non-Catholic media for blowing anything they can out of proportion to make it look far worse than it ever could be in real life. Ditto for "The Passion of the Christ", set to open in movie theatres on Ash Wednesday in February. The Pope himself gave his endorsement after seeing it, so it MUST have something wrong with it. Call CNN and get them on it pronto!!
Anyway, good luck with your resolutions, and be careful what you wish for.
(January 4, 2004)
